


In the Illusion

by sapphire_elliore



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, M/M, also confusing song lyric use to the bloody title, angst af tho, because really I have one in the works, more of a test run tbh, slightly vague work, this is a drabble
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-23
Updated: 2016-10-23
Packaged: 2018-08-24 04:13:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8356699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sapphire_elliore/pseuds/sapphire_elliore
Summary: One contemplates, while the other is not there.IwaOi. Angst. Very vague.





	

**Author's Note:**

> It's what happens when you have a Physics 71 exam coming and trying to study for it with the accompaniment of music that made you write this whole piece instead of reviewing. 
> 
> (Kudos/reviews : 12/10 would recommend)

_Just a little bit of your heart,_

_Just a little bit of your heart,_

_Just a little bit of your heart is all I want,_

_Just a little bit of your heart,_

_Just a little bit of your heart,_

_**Just a little bit is all I’m asking for.**_

*

_I have always been there for you._

The companion to your adventures, from roaming around the rural/urban little town of ours, to every adrenaline-fuelled step on the court.

I have seen every expression you can make, from the smiles of victories to even the barely-there sadness. You won’t let anybody else see it, so nobody else would know. But you know I can, and therefore you let me do something about it as well, because “you can’t handle it alone”. 

You can’t. 

As much as you would want to handle it yourself.

But why is it that _that makes me feel needed?_

And to top it all off, I _want to be needed by **you?**_

I am your friend, and therefore I should be there for you, so that shouldn’t be such a big deal. 

But why am I so happy that you, of all people, would break your strong facade in front of me, to seek my comfort, to help you ease your pains and insecurities?

Why do I feel _special_?

I am in no position to do so, _to feel---_

I’m your best friend.

_I’m the partner you’d always be proud of to have._

**_That is what I’ll ever be._ **

But here I am, pulling my thoughts here, and trying the illusion of relaying everything I feel for you when we both know it couldn’t happen.

We couldn’t achieve what we both want in the end, if you even want me the same way I want you.

We would be successful, you know. Get a pro-career, or be successful athletes, have a great life after everything we’ve been through.

Every match on the court, when I’m feeling anxious and distressed, I’d turn to you and see you brimming with happiness and excitement and pure passion and it’ll all be gone.

And then when we finish our matches, whether win or lose, I’d look at the team—our team and then turn to you, and feel okay and happy and content about _everything_.

But as I fell down earlier, and realize that this injury will further get worse every minute I push myself even though we lost to Karasuno and there’s no hope for us to play against them because that was our last chance ; I asked myself; 

_Is it our last chance to be together as well?_

And that wasn’t even on the court.

I wasn’t even thinking if we could still play together on the court, it was the thought of you staying by my side, just being with me in general.

_Ah,_ up to this point I don’t even know what I’m asking for. I can never be more than your friend, so I’d just say that let me just be by your side?

Let me be the one you’ll rush to when you feel down, let me comfort you on times you need someone to, let me be your friend no matter what happens.

_No matter how I feel, no matter how much you know what I feel._

And when you meet her, the person you’ll choose to spend the rest of your life with, and be the father of her children; let me know, please?

Smile at me and say you found her, and just thank me for such being a good friend for you?

But never, ever ask me to stand up and make a speech as your best man.

I am your best man, but I’m not that good to stand up and wish you both happiness;

Because if that hypothetically would happen, then I can’t fathom seeing you and her together when all I could think is those times when we were together and how badly I wish that that was me beside her.

_**Be also a good friend to me, Iwaizumi.** _

**Author's Note:**

> hit me up @darkhufflephan on tumblr for the trash stuff  
> or hit me up on my writing blog @sapphire-elliore to send me writing-related stuff. Yea <3


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